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Jul. 31st, 2011 11:18 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alt_aliceIt's been a few days since we've been back, and I wanted to be sure to catch all of you up on how our trip went. Kingsley, once again, thank you so very much for the chance to see my children.
This time, we went to the Lakes district, and spent quite a lot of time hiking and mountain-climbing, and swimming of course. We spent an entire day doing nothing but sitting out in the sun and paddling around, which was just heaven. Both Neville and Evelyn brought presents for Kevin, and taught him all sorts of new words, and he toddled around after them so much that he slept like a rock every night. We were worried that the excitement of it all might make Kevin show his magic, which would be quite awkward all round, seeing as how he's supposed to not have any, but he held off for the time being, thank goodness.
Neville was quite determined to improve in his defensive skills -- I could tell that not getting in to that programme really stung, and he didn't want to feel as if he'd been left behind -- so we set up a course for him by the campsite, and spent a bit of time teaching him some things we thought he'd find useful. Disarming and disabling spells, mostly. Evelyn could care less about learning how to fight -- she was much more interested in how to be properly secretive. How to write secret messages, and how to walk around without making a sound, that sort of thing. It's only natural that she ought to pick up on those things as being important, seeing as how she's got some rather large secrets of her own to worry over.
The two of them are both navigating through choppy waters with their school mates -- although the end of the term was a good deal easier than the start of it, and Neville has his solid group of friends, he's had a falling-out with two of his roommates, and that is always difficult. I'm a bit more worried about Evelyn -- after her first year at school, she's close to one girl in her class, and a girl a few years older, and that appears to be about it other than Neville. I spent some time talking about it, and she said very sensibly that she wanted to be friends with people who liked her for who she was, but I hope she is able to find more people like that this next term. She also mentioned that she was concerned about getting harassed by one of the older boys in her house -- an older boy named McClaggen. Apparently, he picks on Katrina Bundy, who is one of the girls she's become friendly with, and she was worried he'd start to pick on her too. So we talked over what to be worried about, and when to talk to someone in charge, and what to do if she ever gets into a situation that makes her feel uncomfortable, including some rather basic moves she can make if someone (Merlin forbid) tries to grab at her or worse. This is not the sort of conversation I was expecting to have with my daughter at such a young age, but this was something she was genuinely concerned about, and I figure it's better to give her tools to deal with what may happen than wish that it won't happen at all. Evelyn has a wonderful older brother, too, and I'm glad they are in the same house so that he can keep an eye on her.
We also spent some time talking about boggarts. Neville's had some trouble with boggarts over the last year or so -- Poppy is more than aware of this, but every time his class has had to deal with boggarts, he's gotten out of it by either getting sick, or crashing his broom. It's because he knows what it'll be, and he was worried it would get us all into trouble -- he told us the thing he fears the most is that Frank and I will be captured, and if that shows up to everybody else, he's made a point of publicly disowning us, and that would just go right out the window.
The reason we were talking of them was because Neville was worried that Evelyn would be in a similar position when she encounters boggarts of her own either this year or next in Defence. So that lead to a conversation about what boggarts were like, and which forms they took, and how to fight them, as well as what our greatest fears were. Frank and I came across a boggart a few years back, so we were able to share our own experiences. My boggart was a bit hard to admit to. It was Neville, fully grown and showing me a Dark Mark on his arm and laughing. When I said what it was, Neville got this determined look on his face, and said that I never needed to worry, because that would never happen, and he looked so much like Frank right at that moment, and I burst into tears and gave him a giant hug right then and there, and we both felt better for it after.
We also talked a bit about what Evelyn's might be. She decided her boggart would probably be Neville getting his wand broken, and getting expelled from Hogwarts. At least that's the first thing that came to her mind. Goodness knows in children of that age, fears change and grow. I don't think her boggart as it stands would be particularly damning (other than raising the question as to what she thinks Neville would do to get expelled, that is), but we told her that if she was worried about it, that there was nothing wrong about skipping out on it like Neville had. He offered to help her if it came down to that.
So, you can see we had an awful lot to discuss, and I hope that both Neville and Evelyn feel better prepared for their upcoming term. They are growing up so quickly that it makes my head spin.
This time, we went to the Lakes district, and spent quite a lot of time hiking and mountain-climbing, and swimming of course. We spent an entire day doing nothing but sitting out in the sun and paddling around, which was just heaven. Both Neville and Evelyn brought presents for Kevin, and taught him all sorts of new words, and he toddled around after them so much that he slept like a rock every night. We were worried that the excitement of it all might make Kevin show his magic, which would be quite awkward all round, seeing as how he's supposed to not have any, but he held off for the time being, thank goodness.
Neville was quite determined to improve in his defensive skills -- I could tell that not getting in to that programme really stung, and he didn't want to feel as if he'd been left behind -- so we set up a course for him by the campsite, and spent a bit of time teaching him some things we thought he'd find useful. Disarming and disabling spells, mostly. Evelyn could care less about learning how to fight -- she was much more interested in how to be properly secretive. How to write secret messages, and how to walk around without making a sound, that sort of thing. It's only natural that she ought to pick up on those things as being important, seeing as how she's got some rather large secrets of her own to worry over.
The two of them are both navigating through choppy waters with their school mates -- although the end of the term was a good deal easier than the start of it, and Neville has his solid group of friends, he's had a falling-out with two of his roommates, and that is always difficult. I'm a bit more worried about Evelyn -- after her first year at school, she's close to one girl in her class, and a girl a few years older, and that appears to be about it other than Neville. I spent some time talking about it, and she said very sensibly that she wanted to be friends with people who liked her for who she was, but I hope she is able to find more people like that this next term. She also mentioned that she was concerned about getting harassed by one of the older boys in her house -- an older boy named McClaggen. Apparently, he picks on Katrina Bundy, who is one of the girls she's become friendly with, and she was worried he'd start to pick on her too. So we talked over what to be worried about, and when to talk to someone in charge, and what to do if she ever gets into a situation that makes her feel uncomfortable, including some rather basic moves she can make if someone (Merlin forbid) tries to grab at her or worse. This is not the sort of conversation I was expecting to have with my daughter at such a young age, but this was something she was genuinely concerned about, and I figure it's better to give her tools to deal with what may happen than wish that it won't happen at all. Evelyn has a wonderful older brother, too, and I'm glad they are in the same house so that he can keep an eye on her.
We also spent some time talking about boggarts. Neville's had some trouble with boggarts over the last year or so -- Poppy is more than aware of this, but every time his class has had to deal with boggarts, he's gotten out of it by either getting sick, or crashing his broom. It's because he knows what it'll be, and he was worried it would get us all into trouble -- he told us the thing he fears the most is that Frank and I will be captured, and if that shows up to everybody else, he's made a point of publicly disowning us, and that would just go right out the window.
The reason we were talking of them was because Neville was worried that Evelyn would be in a similar position when she encounters boggarts of her own either this year or next in Defence. So that lead to a conversation about what boggarts were like, and which forms they took, and how to fight them, as well as what our greatest fears were. Frank and I came across a boggart a few years back, so we were able to share our own experiences. My boggart was a bit hard to admit to. It was Neville, fully grown and showing me a Dark Mark on his arm and laughing. When I said what it was, Neville got this determined look on his face, and said that I never needed to worry, because that would never happen, and he looked so much like Frank right at that moment, and I burst into tears and gave him a giant hug right then and there, and we both felt better for it after.
We also talked a bit about what Evelyn's might be. She decided her boggart would probably be Neville getting his wand broken, and getting expelled from Hogwarts. At least that's the first thing that came to her mind. Goodness knows in children of that age, fears change and grow. I don't think her boggart as it stands would be particularly damning (other than raising the question as to what she thinks Neville would do to get expelled, that is), but we told her that if she was worried about it, that there was nothing wrong about skipping out on it like Neville had. He offered to help her if it came down to that.
So, you can see we had an awful lot to discuss, and I hope that both Neville and Evelyn feel better prepared for their upcoming term. They are growing up so quickly that it makes my head spin.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 05:02 pm (UTC)Perhaps someone could capture one and bring it out to where you'll be camping, next summer? You could teach him yourselves, it's not complicated. Merely unnerving in the extreme, if you encounter one unexpectedly.
For that matter, it's sometimes possible to develop a particular fear, if you'd like your boggart to take a different form. It's something the opposite of the steps one takes to get over a particular fear.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 05:17 pm (UTC)We did talk about the mechanics of defeating a boggart, of course, but you're right -- it is worth seeing if we can track one down for next time.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 05:35 pm (UTC)It's between you and Neville whether it's worth the risk, I'd say.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 07:04 pm (UTC)I think it'd probably be better to suggest it in person, when we could talk it over and he could have some guidance.
I wish
It'd be nice if he could get some private tutoring. We only see him a handful of times a year as it is, and he has so many things he wants to learn.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 06:20 pm (UTC)I think I'd tell them that a boggart can be deceiving, as well - I mean, they can surprise you. Sometimes it's a legitimate fear and sometimes it's something much more primal. Like clowns or fruitcake.
But Remus is right: The best way to deal with them is practising and knowing what to expect. It's a pity they can't do that in a safe place.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 06:52 pm (UTC)Children these days have so many more things to be genuinely afraid of.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 06:21 pm (UTC)That McLaggan bloke sounds a treat. Did you teach her the hex to make him itch uncontrollably if he tries to touch her?
no subject
Date: 2011-07-31 06:50 pm (UTC)She was particularly amused by the various ways she could use her knee to hurt him where it counts. I hope she'll never have cause to use it, but I'd like to think it'll make her feel braver, and less likely to take any nonsense from him.
no subject
Date: 2011-08-01 02:32 am (UTC)(Well, aside from having to drink polyjuice throughout the week, of course.)
no subject
Date: 2011-08-01 02:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-08-01 02:46 am (UTC)What do you think about this business with the magazine and your daughter?
no subject
Date: 2011-08-01 05:47 pm (UTC)She has her heart so set on it, though. We intend to keep talking with her, to make sure she's keeping her head through all this. I suppose that's all we can do. Perhaps we can head off temptations by pointing out that they are temptations. It's tricky to do, however, because we can't spell out TOO much our objections.